What is Family Mediation?

Family Mediation is a voluntary and confidential process which helps joint decision making without the use of courts. Due to recent changes in government thinking, family mediation is slowly becoming the preferred method to resolve and prevent disputes. It is a legally privileged process which means anything said in mediation cannot be disclosed in court unless both parties agree. Confidentiality does not apply, however, if there are significant concerns about the well-being and safety of children or adults - in such cases the appropriate agency will be contacted.

The mediators do not tell you what to do. They are there to help you reach your own agreements concerning all aspects of your separation or divorce e.g. children, finances, property etc. Freely negotiated agreements can help restore communication, understanding and trust.

Family Mediators - who are they?

Our mediators are professionals with a wealth of skills and experience in family mediation and conflict resolution. All are affiliated to NFM, one of the founding members of the Family Mediation Council, the body which regulates standards of practice in family mediation. All are qualified to provide publicly funded ('legally aided') family mediation on behalf of the Legal Services Commission.

Who is Family Mediation for?

Our service is open to any separating or divorcing parents or couples who are experiencing difficulties agreeing arrangements for their children or finances, including property. We offer mediation to all, regardless of age, race, nationality, sexuality, mobility, faith and other such factors. For those whose first language is other than English, interpreter services can be provided.

Mediation is also available to other family members, such as grandparents, who may be having difficulties over contact and residence arrangements.

How can Mediation help?

Family Mediation offers you a 'time out' in a neutral, safe place where you and your former partner can meet with impartial mediators to work out agreements concerning your children and / or finances.

Where children are involved, while you may cease to be partners, you will always be parents and we believe you are the best people to decide your children's future.

What does it cost?

The Legal Services Commission will pay fees for those eligible for Legal Aid. As a charity, we ask other to pay according to income on a sliding scale. Please contact us or see 'where is my nearest service?' section of the site for more details.

How long does it take?

For child only mediation, usually between 1 and 2 sessions. Each sessions lasts around an hour and a quarter.

For cases that include resolving issues of finance and property, usually between 1 and 3 sessions, each lasting up to 1.5 hours.

Do I need a solicitor?

We recommend that you use a Solicitor to obtain independent legal advice during the process of mediation, however, use of the Solicitor will be targeted, therefore avoiding the hefty legal costs associated with the traditional route of 'solicitor only'. The mediator will talk to you about this and options available to you.

A record of any agreements reached during mediation will be provided to you when mediation is complete. This will not be legally binding, but you can take it to your Solicitor to see if a legal agreement can be formalised. This is often the case where proposals are made relating to property and finances.

What if there is already a court case?

Although we are independent of the court, you may still be referred to our Service if the court thinks the Family Mediation Service could help you. Time will be allowed for this in the court process. In most cases, the court would want you to make your own decisions rather than these being imposed on you by the court.

Since the 6th April 2011, Judges are increasingly referring clients to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) before the case can progress in court. This is an initial meeting with the mediator who will provide you with the information about alternative options to court, the mediation process and assess whether mediation is appropriate in your circumstances.

What about financial and property matters?

We can mediate about finance and property matters whether or not children are involved.

You may need to decide together what to do about:

• the house
• pensions
• savings or any other assets
• debts
• child support

The mediator can help you look at different options for sorting things out. You may need to plan for future change to income or expenditure following your separation. Mediation will involve making full financial disclosure so that you can make informed decisions about your finances together - the mediator will talk to you both about this.

How can I make an appointment?

We would be pleased to hear from you direct on 0300 4000 636.

You can also contact a family mediation service in your area on the 'where is my nearest service?' section of the site.

We also take referrals from Solicitors, the court and other helping / support agencies.

What if my partner doesn't want to come?

We arrange separate interviews for each of you first of all, so that you can discuss your situation individually and find out more about the mediation process. However, we are also able to see you together for the first interview, should you so wish. Please note that mediation cannot take place unless you both voluntarily attend a mediation session together.

Further information

For more information on how to start the process of mediation or to book an initial meeting, please see Mediation Information and Assessment Meetings (MIAMs).

See also our articles on using mediation and getting the best out of mediation.

For more information see our Frequently Asked Questions pages.